All you can ever learn is what you already know

Life goes on, come of age... can't hold on, turn the page... time rolls on, wipe these eyes... yesterday laughs, tomorrow cries...

As always, life will go on. This song seems quite relevant to personal struggles as of late. With everyone on edge, it will only be so long before someone make a mistake, treads on one's spirit, or makes the mistake of caring too much- or not at all.

Looking back, it seems that just things were so simple... and while I wouldn't trade anything for the where I am in life now, sometimes you wonder how choosing between Halo and Smash Bros. has mutated into getting out of bed and deciding which fake smile and laugh to wear today. A good quote comes to mind: "You wear a mask for so long, and you start to forget who you really are..." It seems unnervingly fitting in the current scheme of things. While others busy themselves among seemingly mundane activities, we remain focused and chained to winning the fight against a never ending tide of pain and sorrow... for no matter what we do or say life has and will always be that rainy cloud and that overdrawn bank account, the annoying injury and the regretful choice, the societal outcast and that demon from your past that ties you down and haunts you and still makes it hard just to look in a mirror. To just for a day live a life through someone else's eyes, to have made the left turn instead of the right, to just one day be happy to get up in the morning and be anxious to start the new day. For us these luxuries are few and far between, but we have fought through to now and shall move along just to make it through.

Though it may pain some to hear this, it holds true for we three. "Take my hand, and we'll make it I swear, whoa, living on a prayer"... because for the time being, that's all we have, a prayer.. whether anyone hears, much less answers it, is inconsequential. What matters is that it gives everyone trapped living in repetition that ever important piece of mind. To know that there is something to see and hold, to work for and to grow, to hold on to, to get you through the night, is what really matters. Because to have hope, and people to hope with, is what really matters. And looking at it, I am grateful for this fucked up yet oddly interesting state, because in a very strange way, I am thankful for what I have gained out of it because I know its all that I've wanted.



P.S.
I would like to thank The Ataris, The Offspring, All American Rejects, Bon Jovi, Boston, and Green Day for contributing to this post.